that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
