I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You are the jesus of drinking
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
