every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize