we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
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