Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
