I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
