i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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