Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
