Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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