She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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