is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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