is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
