so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I want to be your penis for a week.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
