yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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