my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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