So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
