i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
