i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
