the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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