well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize