I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
