If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
you would pick up someone in the library
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
