Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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