I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
He felt like a one man threesome
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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