don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize