i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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