The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
