I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
