No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
