hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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