so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
