Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
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