Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
