I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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