Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
