you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
