I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
