Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
