So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
What drink are we having for lunch?
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
