I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
