ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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