hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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