I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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