I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
