That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
