Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Enjoy the penises
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
