im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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