i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
