420 ftw
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Randomize
