okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
